Supernatural Imagines

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Posts tagged with "trigger warning: eating disorder"

sam imagine where the reader has an eating disorder and he finds out, he's angry and starts yelling at first but when he calms down it's fluffy? then maybe a time lapse to when she's recovered? (if you're comfortable with that)

Anonymous

Hi! Thanks for your request. Personally, I’ve never dealt with an eating disorder so I’m not entirely sure that I got that part of it right, but I did try my best! I hope you like it.

TRIGGER WARNING: EATING DISORDER, MILD VERBAL ABUSE OF THE READER.

~~~~~~~

You looked at yourself in the mirror, ran your fingers along your bare ribcage. It wasn’t enough. It was never, ever enough. No matter how many times you purged or starved yourself, it was never enough.

You knew what people thought when they looked at you. You could see the judgement in their eyes. Fat. You were fat and nothing was going to change it.

You hated your body, hated the way it looked. Mirrors were your greatest enemy. But tonight, as you were getting changed, you couldn’t help but catch a glimpse of your reflection.

Your stomach bulged, your arms were flabby and your thighs were like tree stumps. Fat. That’s all you were.

Suddenly, the door banged open, causing you to jump and spin around, only to find Sam standing in the doorway.

“Shit, Y/N, I’m sorry. I didn’t realise you were in- What the hell?” he exclaimed, his eyes focusing on your exposed torso.

“Get out, Sam!” you yelled at him, grabbing a blanket from the bed to cover yourself.

“No! I’m not leaving until you tell me what the hell is going on, Y/N!”

“I don’t know what you mean,” you replied.

“What I mean,” Sam responded, taking a step towards you, “Is that you look like something we might dig up to salt and burn.”

“Sam-” you began, only to be cut off.

“Damn it, Y/N! What’s wrong with you? Dean and I bust our arses trying to protect you! We risk our lives for you. And clearly, that is a total waste of time, considering that your problem is not monsters, but yourself!” he yelled at you.

You didn’t know how to respond. You stood in the centre of the room, taking in shallow breaths and fighting the tears you knew were going to spill at any moment.

Noticing this, Sam crossed the room to stand beside you.

“Oh God, Y/N, I’m so sorry,” he said, trying to wrap his arms around you.

“Don’t touch me!” you choked out, shoving his arms aside.

“Y/N, I didn’t mean that. I just can’t stand seeing you like this. You’re so beautiful and I just can’t stand the thought of you destroying yourself because you can’t see that.”

You looked up at him and saw guilt and pain on his face.

“You’re lying,” you whispered. “I’m not beautiful. I’m ugly and I’m fat. I’m like a freaking elephant!”

“No, you’re not,” Sam said softly. He reached out and steered you gently in front of the mirror.

“Look at yourself,” he told you. “Take a good look at yourself and tell me that there is not one thing beautiful about you.”

“There’s not one thing beautiful about me,” you stated, glancing at your reflection.

“Look harder.”

You did. You kept looking, even if just to appease Sam.

“Fine,” you finally said. “My eyes. I like my eyes, okay? Now are we done here?”

“Not yet,” Sam told you, coming up behind you to wrap his arms around you. “There’s something that I think you need to hear first.”

“What?” you sighed.

“You’re right about one thing. Your eyes are beautiful. They’re one of my favourite things about you. And I’d hate to see those eyes stop shining because you think that nothing else about you is beautiful,” he answered, reaching up to wipe the tears from your cheeks.

“I’m still fat, though,” you replied.

“You’re not, Y/N. In fact, you’re the opposite. This isn’t healthy. Starving yourself or purging or whatever it is that you do is not the answer. You need to stop this,” Sam said.

“I’m scared, Sam,” you whispered.

“I know you are,” he replied. “But I’m gonna help you through this. You won’t have to do this alone,” he continued, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. “I promise.”

*Six Months Later*

“Here you go,” Sam said, handing you a burger he’d picked up on the way back to the motel.

“Thanks,” you responded, grinning up at him.

The past few months had been rough for you, but once you’d seen that your eating habits were unhealthy, you’d started making changes. It wasn’t easy, and even now, there were still days where you would only pick at your food. But each time this happened, Sam walked you over to the nearest mirror and had you say three things you liked about your body.

Gradually, it worked. You were back to a much healthier weight and even though you hadn’t fully recovered yet, Sam was always there to help you through. You weren’t in this alone, just as he had promised.

~~~~~

Thank you for reading! And for anyone reading this who feels the way that the reader in the story does, you’re beautiful. And there are people out there to help you. My ask box is always open if you need it.

Please don’t repost without giving credit!